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I am only reflecting here because no one on facebook save a few are on here and I do not mind if they read this because they have no relation whatsoever to those I am talking about. Many people I am friends with on Facebook on the other hands are related to them in some form, be it in the past or now.

It has now been three years since I freed myself from their bonds. Three years since I grew to be my own person and not rely on others. Three years since I lost the ability to trust people as easily as I used to.

Why so weak?Collapse )
Why isn't my TakaChii fanfic uploaded to my LJ? I wrote it early last year when I was forced to watch the Hey Say PV Making. At least 3 times.

Seriously, why hasn't it been uploaded?

Deco Sweets for sale!

I've got more that I need to put up, but the following are a portion of my newer pieces, since I've tried out different styles and methods of making them. The older pieces are being sold at a discounted price out of fairness and will be uploaded later.

I'm a newbie at selling things online, but my eBay account is j_civ where feedback is visible. Shipping will be calculated according to location. I ship anywhere. I live in Australia. Prices are in AUD.

They are not waterproof so care must be taken when handling.

Warning: Picture heavy and massive sugar overdose.Collapse )

2010 as it was. All the ups and downs...

The year has gone by so quickly I'm standing here going "What the hell did I do most of the time?" as if I'd been in a coma for the most of 2010. It's surprising how a year has gone by so quickly but I'm glad to have finished it and gotten VCE done with.

Speaking of VCE, I'm so happy with my score even if its not one of the best in the world. I hardly studied, much thanks to my laziness and hatred for studying. I'm waiting for the rest of my offers, but I can't help but have a trickle of worry that some of them got lost in the mail. That would be a horrible thing to happen, since the ones that's to come are from William Angliss AND it's the only place I want to go to.

The year started off with a boring and wet NYE party and my dealing with a friend who was pissed - had to drag her home via the tram. Then the school year started, and I learned new things and made new friends, while losing some and realizing who were true friends.

I've also learned to trust my instincts for what it was and to listen to my judgments even if I want to give the person a chance or two.

I haven't been in a relationship all year, but I have had a few difficulties regarding men. I've had two male friends asking me out and they were kindly declined. For some reason I was back together with my ex while I was drunk for the first time in my life and had to break it off with him yet again. I feel really badly for him, but a relationship with him wouldn't work if it is onesided. I'm the kind of person that'll shower friends with lots of affection but I'm certainly not the kind that likes to be glued to someone else against my will (especially when it's making out *glares*) I'm the kind that wouldn't mind not seeing the boyfriend for weeks on end, but he's the one that has a craving to see me constantly, so it wouldn't have worked out anyways.

I went to Japan in November and was really happy to have left Australia and it's inhabitants to suffer the heat for some time while I cruised the streets in the slight chilly air of Autumn. I shopped a lot and had to send three boxes of things through the mail, thanks to obsessive purchasing of socks and super cute clothes. I didn't sight-see much but I did visit some places, such as Universal Studios, Tokyo Disneyland, Tokyo Tower, Ebisu Garden Place, Harajuku, Tokyo Dome, and had the chance to eat at Keikarou, Arashi's Aiba Masaki's family's restaurant! The food was standard, but I didn't mind, because I had a glimpse of of his brother and his father. Uh, what else... I attracted attention like flies to manure and even got perved on rather obviously (although some of the cases were rather hilarious and had me laughing so hard I nearly peed myself. I got to ride the bullet train three times, and also got to see Arashi, who were super energetic and super awesome that I couldn't help but be energetic too.

I've had my down periods this year, mainly where school was concerned, and closed myself off frequently when I was stressed. I had a good year though with my friends, making jokes and hanging out. I'll miss the library for sure, especially the librarian.

I'm going to look for a job so I can make a living for myself and save money to see Arashi and Japan again next year, as I feel I haven't had enough of Japan just yet. I want to go to other places too, but I'll wait till I finish schooling. I've been working on sweets deco and am planning to sell them very soon, though I'm not exactly sure when, considering I've tried out new stuff during the year and have a range of styles when it comes to sweets deco, but I'll sell them anyways as a means to make some room in my workspace.

Anyways, I'm done with this essay-like post and I'm off to watch Kouhaku. Have a lovely new year~

Hating myself again.

Remind me never to come out from beneath a rock when I come back from Japan.

Note to self: No more dating. You'll just hurt them.



Thank you very much.

GAAAAAH! KEYSMASHING!

GACK!

*keysmash*

I should go with my gut feelings more often! Why the hell do I never listen to my instincts! GAH!

God, last night I had a tiny going away party with two friends of mine, one boy and one girl. The girl resolved to make me drunk for the first time in my life and at the start I agreed, but a couple of days later I'm going er-hm.... I just worry about what kind of drunk I would be.

My worst fears came to life: I turned out to be an affectionate drunk, at the beginning I was cuddly and clingy, then made out with the both of them later on in the night. Now. I don't have a problem with kissing my friend (the girl, since she can't remember what happened, and I only have the faintest recollection of kissing her - I just keep on wondering why the hell I did that.) but I have a big-ass problem with the male one.

He's my ex, and now we're >>> somehow <<< back together and I have no freaking idea what I said to make him stick to me the whole night since I didn't get back home after my friend (the girl) got taken to hospital. It's like our relationship all over again! I broke up with him in the first place after six months because I found I didn't really have feelings for him, and now this! I really hurt him the first time around and found it very hard to forgive myself afterward. GAH! I've asked for some time to think about it since I didn't want to hurt him like last time and he accepted. I know he wants a relationship, but I'm just not the right person for that. He's a really nice person, and all, but I still push him away, and I don't think I'll ever develop feelings for him. When I spoke to him today about taking it slow since I've got severe personal issues I need to get over before I can actually commit to being in a relationship, he looked upset and I fear I may have hurt him just a bit there.

WHY DOES THIS HAVE TO HAPPEN TO ME?!?!

I knew this would happen if I got drunk. I just did! I should have stopped it before it got out of hand!


*rams self into a brick wall repeatedly until I become a puddle of blood, bones and flesh*

Ohno Is Better Than A Blanket [One-shot]

Title: Ohno Is Better Than A Blanket
Pairing: Nino x Ohno [Arashi~]
Rating: PG-13 to be safe
Genre: Fluffiness
Disclaimer: I don't own Ohmiya or even Arashi. If I did, I'd bring back Arashi no Shukudai-kun
Summary: Imagine being wet, cold, hungry, tired and grumpy. Just read~
A/N: this is Un-beta-ed.


Follow Nino home please~Collapse )

Tags:

Title: A Girl Never Forgets Her First Kiss
Author: newbielolita
Pairing: Sakurai Sho/Original Character

Characters: Arashi; Aiba, Nino, Sho, Jun and Ohno~ OC and more OC
Rating: PG

Genre: Romance

Disclaimer: I own no celebrities that feature in this little fic; Johnny and others own them, or they own themselves... I do however own Sayuri, and her two little doggies I so want for myself.

Summary: Sayuri has spent most of her life living in Hokkaido with a promise she has remembered ever since she was five. Upon becoming an adult, Sayuri moved to Tokyo with her mother. Even though she was completely deaf, she didn’t let that bother her. Except for one day. That day, she almost died; she crossed the road without thinking but luckily someone happened to be walking by. She doesn’t know him as the popular idol. She knows him as the best friend she once had.

 

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Sayuri says...Collapse )

Tags:

Title: A Girl Never Forgets Her First Kiss
Author: newbielolita
Pairing: Sakurai Sho/Original Character

Characters: Arashi; Aiba, Nino, Sho, Jun and Ohno~ (plus OC) *may have more characters later*
Rating: PG

Genre: Romance

Disclaimer: I own no celebrities that feature in this little fic; Johnny and others own them, or they own themselves... I do however own Sayuri, and her two little doggies I so want for myself.

Summary: Sayuri has spent most of her life living in Hokkaido with a promise she has remembered ever since she was five. Upon becoming an adult, Sayuri moved to Tokyo with her mother. Even though she was completely deaf, she didn’t let that bother her. Except for one day. That day, she almost died; she crossed the road without thinking but luckily someone happened to be walking by. She doesn’t know him as the popular idol. She knows him as the best friend she once had.

Believing is Everything~Collapse )